normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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