Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
