I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize