im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
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