I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
