well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
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