how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
