I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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