I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
