I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Randomize
