That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
