Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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