They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
In other news, I just burned my penis
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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