I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize