I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
