I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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