weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
