I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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