I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
