Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
