windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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