i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
