I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize