love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Randomize
