Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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