he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize