well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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