Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
