Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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