Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
