We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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