Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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