I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize