i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
