Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize