I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
