Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
