You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I skipped work to stalk him.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Randomize