Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize