i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
