Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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