i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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