so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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