therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
