Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize