did you get engaged???
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Randomize
