I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I think we might need a safe word for this...
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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