The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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