Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
