is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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