it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
